Apart from you, the groom, the other person who would be prominent on your big day is your best man. By now you may be narrowing your choices to a reliable few, but this doesn’t mean that it gets easy as you come down to the last three; you may also be facing a tough time in deciding if you’re going for your best friend who’s been with you since middle school, or your best buddy, your brother. You’ll have to make your choice sooner or later; try using these tips to determine which one makes it to the coveted slot.

First of all, your selection shouldn’t be influenced with the notion that your best man should be within the family. If your candidates include your brother or a cousin (which is often the case), well and good, but remember to keep your decision within the limits of your personally-set criteria; he should be the man who has particular significance in your life, and will be able to offer his loyalty and support to you on the wedding day. But if your prime candidate happens to live overseas and cannot possibly keep up with the progress of the preparation due to the distance, it’s best if you reconsider and go for the next best man who is much more accessible to you. Also, if the person you had in mind is the one who’s been with you through thick and thin, he is viable, as long as you also have his future in consideration. Is he having a tough time with his divorce, or is he expecting a child anytime soon? If the answer is in the affirmative, chances are his attention will be divided, to your disadvantage.

Once the personal aspects for the selection are out of the way, you should think about the responsibilities involved with the role. Your best man is in full charge of the rings, a pivotal component in the ceremony. He will also sign as a witness to the wedding vows, and is tasked with providing the toast for your bride at the wedding reception. Is he up to it? Does he have the drive and the skills to take a significant part in the occasion? Can he deliver a speech to a group of anticipating people? Can he deal with last-minute emergencies? And most importantly, is he in good terms with your bride? For this last question, you’ll need to have a thorough talk with your fiancée. Although he is your best man, it is your wedding as a couple, and it wouldn’t go smoothly as expected if your best man and your bride can’t get along well with each other.

Your final choices will more or less include you or your fiancées brother, or a friend who is close to you. This is when it gets really difficult, since all three are eligible; and if they all meet your established criteria, they will all be up to the task to a certain extent. But bear in mind that this is your wedding, and even if you have to go for either or any of them, informing them about your decision, and the reasons which led to it, will reduce any resentment which is otherwise pent up if you went on with the wedding without making an effort to patch up the seams. This ensures that you’ll have a hassle-free, and more importantly, a pleasantly-memorable wedding with your chosen bride.

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